let the doors open to let love in

feeling alone

 

lately i have seen some people i use to talk to alot but now they dont even say a word to me i have the feeling that i did some thing wrong or said some thing wrong! it hurts that i use to know many people when i started buzznet net but now i geting regrets for doing it cause its hurting my feelings an i work hard to try to have friends on here but i gess i push them away. if i did do any thing please tell me so i can fix them if not i might quit buzznet for good

to day i watch the sun rise an set to day over the water its so peace full that i can finaly have my own time away from the house with out the telling me what to do or get that or this away from my own jail i gess you  you can call it.but im clam down alot now i can enjoy my life not to worry about exams in highschool any more pluse now i have to worry about the gas price an my truck to college now. but only 3 days a week not bad at all so im happy whay i have.

these days i see people having love in there hearts when i left cold in this world wishing i never had a past that holds me back hard to go past it. i feel a cold lump in my chest when i see two people near me have fun an holding hands . i wish i canbe let lose  from my chains i hold around me. my heart weigh down with fears an the hate with the other feelings dryed up long ago that once i was never turn back to my old self the care free, happy,always smiling like a care free world,and kind ...... now over the years i grown cold to the touch even when i around others i feel alone lost in the shell i callo my body never free from the pian i hold in side.people say im mad all the time but im not just deep in thalt let the world just run by but it wont even seeing others pain i go an try to help them even i need help for my self. i feel like i take there pain away when im there an their  pain becomes mine to hold.... at one point i did try to kill my self by not being around any one even family i just stop talking after that and kept my head down low like the song   by metallica nothing else matters. i just try to keep the people i know an my friends safe only they known what happens to me but i wont let them get hurt i try to be the sheild for them an the sword to keep them safe

day in an day out i feel like theres nothen in side me .every where i see love an happyness not knowing what to do lost in my own lost soule with a great burden holding me back keep ing away my feelings that i lost long ago wishing i never did ! now im face with the broken  peaces that once was my old life an now. i feel like i only know hate.always ready to keep the ones i call friends safe but for my own self no i dont care what happens to me only the peace that will come if my end ever meats. day in an day out i try my hardest to be like the kind person i use to be. now im faced with lost of the people way back then hunt me with sadness . i feel noth hwen i see people crying or feeling sad like im broken not known where i might call home! feeling dead when happynes comes near me when people around me i turn away know ing i want to know but my frozzen heart stops me in my tracks knowing the pain that once torn throough me when i lost it all on that fatefull day when my mom was barryed i put my feeling an my love with her an cursed good an hated him for taking her from me.  

Darkness feeds

Darkness feeds

  

Feared by all known by few as

I move on with this mark

  

A dark kiss place upon me as

The fangs dig deep as I sleep...

  

Darkness feeds

Darkness feeds

  

Awaken by the pain as the venom

Races to my heart

  

Departed from the world of light

I roam in the world of darkness

Of night

  

Darkness feeds

Darkness feeds

  

Pain and fear are all known to me

Hellbound to the endless darkness

  

Darkness feeds

Darkness feeds

  

Never knowing love an peace

As never release from the

Never ending hunger

  

Darkness feeds

Darkness feeds

  

 

I turn your tears to roses

I turn your tears to roses

 

The world has hurt you and now im here to let love in

 

Within my arms your pain fades away as loneliness

Fades away

 

Day breaks as a new hope feels new to you as your wounds

are gone

 

Redrawn to the light as we walk on holding hands

 

I turn your tears to roses

I turn your tears to roses

 

 I cover you when your cold when your lonely im there

 

Clearing the path for you so the pain and sadness won�t return

 

We learn new ways to heal each other wounds so love sets in

An heals

 

Feels warm and now the pain and sadness are gone

 

I turn your tears to roses

I turn your tears to roses

 

A new day comes and leads us an new way and love

 

I turn your tears to roses â�¦â�¦â�¦â�¦â�¦â�¦.. 

Fire

Fire

Burning in this night I see the pain and sorrow burning in this heart.

 

A dart hits its mark! The feeling flooding in to fast to count as the years go by.

 

I see you laying there crying as another heart is broken bye thy fire!

 

Dire it is to let old wounds heal! But thy wounds are a meal to those hungry eyes!

 

Fire

Fire

Burning in this night I see pain and sorrow killing me as the years go by.

 

Never wanting to be alone but my heart takes a mortal blow!

Tears of blood flow from thy eyes but never granting peace!

 

The feast of happiness evades me as a wolf on its own!

 

Fire

Fire

 

Burning in this night run for your life as I lay here dyeing

Knowing your peace will follow and the pain an sorrow ends with a wolf�s mighty howl!

 

 

 

 

           Tears fall

Tears fall

I see you crying the night away

 

A day will come to end the pain

 

My heart gains a new pain as your tears flow me away

 

A day will never come as my pain covers me away

 

Tears fall

Tears fall

 

Wishing your tears away

 

Day and night eases your pain as I hold u close

 

Never wanting the pain return!

 

Tears fall

Tears fall

 

Your pain eases away as a new day starts but

My pain never ends

 

Minded you are in the arms of love as I hold you close

As my darkness takes hold ��.

 

 

Tears fall

Tears fall

 

 

In the arms of sorrow I hold

 

Thy golden light fades as darkness falls on the battle field.

Death eating its way around me

 

I see u there crying as I try to end your pain!

Main of your pain will heal but thy pain will go on.

 

In the arms of sorrow I hold

 

A wolf gets pulled away from its pack trying to find a way back

A dome of sorrow fills the wolf�s heart

 

As a dart hits near by as the wolf flees

 

My deeds are done as I feel u shaking in my arms

 

Wishing that your pain will just go away an let love in

 

As you mend, my sorrow flows on.

 

Dawn comes as a new day for you as I am imprisoned in the arms of

Sorrow

 

 

 

A battle

A battle

 

As I pick up this mantle covered in blood as the mud clings

 

Death sings as my blade dances as my chances become slim

 

My whim for the blood to end as wishing mends this broken heart

 

Tart taste fills my mouth as my blood comes up as the blade enters my heart

 

Art of the blade sways to an thro as death all around me

 

Not free as I forged on

 

Drawn to this endless madness as sadness covers me

 

A battle

A battle

 

As I rattle the cage as the rage from the beast inside

 

I cried out as I pull the blade out!

 

All-out blood frenzy takes hold

 

Cold fangs form as I kill thy enemy

 

A battle

A battle

 

As I watch the dead cry out

 

Without anyone to tell me it�s over

 

As my love walks the battle torn land

 

Close to hand I call out to her as she keeps on walking

 

My heart flees as she leaves me to the battle at hand�..

 

A battle

A battle

 

I stand as the expanding darkness takes hold

 

Cold to the world for this battle never ends��.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

     Walking around hearing the cryâ��s of the dead these blades in me. Oh. These blades in me! Roaming this earth known this darkness coming out!

 

Lone wolf

Lone wolf

 

Thrown in this darkness inside as I kill the foe

 

Blow after blow darkness tearing me apart!

 

At heart wishing to end this darkness as this battle go�s on

 

Dawn comes as a new day starts but the fighting goes on

 

Foregone in my past as the darkness flows

 

I snap too rows of my foes come to end this very life!

 

Strife unfolds as the bodies of my foes

 

Lone wolf

Lone wolf

 

Returning from the endless bloodshed I will never be the same

 

Shame fills my heart as I see my friends and love ones

 

Son�s of darkness I am not letting any one near

 

Tears fall as the darkness goes on

 

Drawn to this endless pain I have but can�t spare myself the pain that comes

 

Drums of darkness play to thy ears

 

Fear plays with the enemy as I kill in numbers as lone to this fight!

 

Lone wolf

Lone wolf

 

Im the Amir of  this death land as I rule aloneâ�¦.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

poem i wrote

Fire
fire

burning in this night i see the pain and sorrow burning in this heart.

a dart hits its mark! the feeling flooding in to fast to count as the years go by.

i seeyou laying there crying as another heart broken be thy fire!

dire it is to let old wounds heal! but thy wounds are a meal to those hngry eyes.

fire
fire

burning in this night i see pain and sorrow killing me as the years go by.

never wanting to be alone  but my heart takes a mortal blow!

tears of blood flow from thy eyes but never grantingpeace!

the feast of happieness evades me as a wolf on its's own!

fire
fire

burning in this night run for your life as i lay here dying
knowin your peace will follow an pain and sorrow ends with a wolf's mighty howl!

Lyrics to Take Me Under :
Now it seems I’m fading
All my dreams are not worth saving
I’ve done my share of waiting
And I’ve still got nowhere else to go
So I wait for you to
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Seems you’re wanting me to stay
But my dreams would surely waste away
And I still have nowhere else to go
So I wait for you to
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Now it seems you’re leaving
But we’ve only just begun
And you’ve still got nowhere else to go
So I wait for you to
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

And I’ve been waiting so long
And I’ve been waiting so long
And I’ve been waiting so long

So I wait for you to
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Push me under
Pull me father
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

And I’ve been waiting so long
And I’ve been waiting so long
And I’ve been waiting so long

So I wait for you to
Take me all the way
Take me all the way

Lyrics to Get Out Alive :
No time for goodbye he said
As he faded away
Don't put your life in someone's hands
Their bound to steal it away
Don't hide your mistakes
'Cause they'll find you, burn you
Then he said

If you want to get out alive
Hold on for your life
If you want to get out alive
Hold on for your life

This is my last time she said
As she faded away
It's hard to imagine
But one day you'll end up like me
Then she said

If you want to get out alive
Hold on for your life
If you want to get out alive
Hold on for your life
If you want to get out alive (If you want to get out alive)
Hold on for your life (Life)
If you want to get out alive (If you want to get out alive)
Hold on for your life

If I stay it won't be long
Till I'm burning on the inside
If I go I can only hope
That I make it to the other side
If you want to get out alive
Hold on for your life
If you want to get out alive
Hold on for

If you want to get out alive (If you want to get out alive)
Hold on for your life
If you want to get out alive (If you want to get out alive)
Hold on for:

If I stay, it won't be long
Till I'm burning on the inside
If I go I can only hope
That I make it to the other side
If I stay, it won't be long
Till I'm burning on the inside
If I go, if I go

Burning on the inside
Burning on the inside
Burning on the inside

Lyrics to Animal I Have Become :
I can't escape this hell
So many times i've tried
But i'm still caged inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one would ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
(This animal, this animal)

I can't escape myself
(I can't escape myself)
So many times i've lied
(So many times i've lied)
But there's still rage inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one would ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal

Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
Somebody wake me from this nightmare
I can't escape this animal

(This animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal)

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
(This animal I have become)

this song i like the most when useing my sword

Steel a soul for a second chance

But you will never become a man

My chosen torture makes me stronger

In a life that craves the hunger

A Freedom and a quest for life

Until the end the judgment night

Stepping forth a cure for soul's demise

Reap the tears of the victim's cries

Yearning more to hear the suffer (of a)

Of a demon as I put it under

Killed before, a time to kill them all

Passed down the righteous law

Serve a justice that dwells in me

Lifeless corpse as far as the eye can see

The eye can see (X3)

We are falling

The light is calling

Tears inside me

Calm me down

Bless me with the

Leaf off of the tree

On it I see

The freedom reign

We are falling

The light is calling

Tears inside me

Calm me down

Midnight calling

Mist of resolving

Crown me, with the

Pure green leaf

Bless me with the

Leaf off of the tree

On it I see

The freedom reign

Praise to my father

Blessed by the water

Black night, dark sky

The devil's cry

The powers proven to end the madness

Upon I take it to end the savage

The rays of light a truth of meaning

To my father the blood is pleading

A justice rage for all to feel

With innocent cries and hatred squeals

The gore of evil seems to satisfy

When slain an maimed and pacified

my chosen torture makes me stronger

In a life that craves the hunger

A Freedom and a quest for life

Until the end the judgment night

Watch the footsteps but never follow

If you want to live tomorrow

Steel a soul for a second chance

But you will never become a man

[Lyric: Tetsuya Shibata - Demon Voice: Shawn McPherson]

   Darkness coats us. The smell of fall changing season .the graveyard is alive, black cat across my path, the chill of the cold wind, the breath of the dead. Imprisoned souls. Trapped for eternity. Black crows break the silence. The garden of the dead’s alive tonight an you can’t stop it. Just enjoy it. Open up your mind and you feel it too. the sound, the touch, the thoughts,, that you’ve been so blind to. You can feel the thoughts of the dead. True or false, its still there teaching me. True or false still there teaching me. you can feel it tonight. The wood has rotted away. Take this time to absorb it. Their time is slipping away. Stone all carved by hand. Statues embers night flickering away. Timeless  but soon gone. Timeless but soon gone, with just my thoughts. as I can find myself, alone with just my thoughts . as time crumbles away as I crumble away.

AVENGED SEVENFOLD (LOWERING THE SEVENTH TRUNPET  ) song three 

 

‘ALMOST EASY’

Im losing the fight, I’ve treated you so wrong now let me make it right I feel insane every time im asked to compromise ~ cause im afraid and stuck in my ways and that’s the way it stays ~ so how long did I expect love to outweigh ignorance? ~ by that look on your face  I may  have force the scale to tip ~ im not insane, im insane ~ im not insane ~ (mother) ~ come back to me its almost easy ~ (said it all) ~ come back again it’s all most easy ~ shame pulse through my heart from the thing’s I’ve done to you ~ it’s hard to face nut the fact remains that this is nothing new ~ l left you bound and tied with suicidal memories ~ selfish beneath the skin but deep inside im not insane ~ im not insane ~ im not  insane ~ im not insane ~ im not insane ~ (mother) ~ come back to me its almost easy ~ ( said it)  ~ come back again easy ~ ( you  have learn your lesson ) ~ come  back to me almost easy ~ (but first  you fall) ~ come back it almost easy ~ now that I lost you its kills me to say ~ (hurts to say) ~ I’ve try  to hold  on as you  slowly slip away ~ im  losing the fight, I’ve treated you so wrong  now let make it right ~ (make it right) ~ im not insane ~ im not insane ~ im not….. not insane ~ (mother) ~ come back to me its almost easy ~ ( you have learned from your lesson ) ~ come back to me its almost easy ~ ( but you’ll fall) ~ come back again its almost easy!

AVENGED SENENFOLD

 

 

 

 

I'm the only one that can live through pain an loneliness but i too is a fighter by heat two deadly parts to put together my body maybe scared an my heart coldbut theres love inside me waiting for me .Ive been by my self an keep all true pains of the past . i fight a good fight to keep my sole in checkmy earthly bonds keep me inline with this world but that not all i need i need a love one that can help me in this darkes hour because the darkness is rising in side my body but i try to control myself.

i went to the doc to see if i need help but found out  i have a lot of unfinsh jobs i need to in my life.

to day at 5 to 5:30 in the moring i was on my way to work some one hunting dog got hit in the road near where i live the dog was half live an half dead i went back to see if the dog is able to be saved or i could give it less pain buut when i got there i saw the life die away in its eyes i did what i had to do i pull the dog out of the road an pull the id off the dog what i could  i always had some one die near me an i was to blame my self  for it . i use to keep to my self an now im alittle a scared  to let someone in my life scared to let some one in. at work last year i had three dead puppys when i was at work  i feel real bad for it.

 

im so sick of the pain i go throught at home an at school just wish i could have no ropes tieing me to where im not wanted so i just living hell . wish i cold just shap shift in to a wolf to run free with no worrys . but that will never happen so im just a little wore out from the stuped shit i have to go through.

man to day was the worst day for me to i thalt i had found the right one but i think i had no time for her but i never had the chance to give her my note sence i lost my phone. i never let any one get that close to me befor an i lost sight an i mess up she dump me like i was nothen never call me or any thing so i put that in the scares  an keep my self true and strate .

im a single teen love never finds